unnecessary..

leroy is soooo fucking annoying. always has been so i guess he always will be. aren't you a little to old to be instigating?? ugh. he has nooooooo type of 'understanding'..i guess that is what mothers are for =[ sigh...he a fucking hypocrite. anywho , him&ma got into it now he is talking about she can't come back home til she gets her shit together. argument wasn't even that big. don't always agree with everything ma does but this time leroy took it toooo far.

it perplexes me how i get caught in the middle of every argument between everybody in my life. shit don't even have nothing to do with me. but i gotta listen to it. niggas come in the room i'm sitting in to argue!! so i leave & niggas follow. i need an outlet , somewhere to go when i don't feel like listening to & dealing with the drama. & it is ironic because my house & i (smh) are a lot of my friends' outlet. people come here to talk to me , to grieve , to stay & just get a lot off their chest. when is it my turn?? where do i go?? i tried to fake sleep today because i thought that would prevent leroy from coming into my room yelling at the top of his fucking lungs about him&ma situation..YEAH FUCKING RIGHT!! fuck you telling me for. & i want to walk out but where am i going to go?? & i want to talk about it but can't call anyone. smh.

really feeling sooooo ugh...

something else that has been bothering me a little is how ma boyfriend is. he doesn't have to be my bestfriend or nothing but i don't understand why he is sooooo anti-social. it puts a strain on the household. i don't even feel right sitting in the same room as him&ma. & i want to chill w. her when she is home but he be having hissy fits whenever she do something that doesn't involve him. he is a GREAT father as i stated before but you family now..loosen up wtf. i miss my sister & i know somethings HAD to change but this to much. smh , home life s u c k s.

work was cool..training is always blahh , movies & paperwork & shit. i have to get up at eight tomorrow so i have no idea why i am up right now. guess i gotta get used to this again...

random : my jaw keeps locking!! this shit hurt. i was trying to eat my mcdonalds this afternoon & i could hardly open my mouth to get the food in & couldn't even chew =[ food makes me happy lol ...that was the first & last thing i ate all day..i'm full off of chocolate milk..through a straw smh. & i can't yell. yelling makes me even happier hehe.

yawning..gonna check my crops & knock out.

home is where the heart is , right??