assBACKWARDS.

not tryna start a fight , not worth the drama , just gonna laugh about it , its not worth my time. . .for a beautifulLIAR.

but you're still on my mind "/ so unlike me.

. . .good dude , right place , wrong time
its odd how we want those who don't 'want' us
but look right past the ones who do.

and the idiotic part about it is that i don't have an exact solid reason...i just don't want him. ness thinks i've officially lost it. shit , i think i've lost it. but i have little control over what and who crosses my mind , just call me crazy. i'll put my hand in the fire and sooner or later i'll get what i'm asking for.




"i am ready for love
all the joy and the pain
and all the time that it takes
just to stay in your good grace
lately i've been thinking
your not ready for me
maybe you think i need to learn maturity
they say watch what you ask for
cause you might recieve
but if you ask me tomorrow
i will say the same thing
. . .i am ready for love"


what looks good to you , ain't always good for you.

=]

whoa , it's been forever. due to lack of a computer of course...i would never disappear for no reason lol ")

i just finished watching some youtube vids of the MJ memorial , very nice...lately i've been all cried out but stevie wonder brought tears to my eyes with "I NEVER DREAMED YOU'D LEAVE IN SUMMER" everyone else was nice as well ...so now i'm just listening to some mary & trying to collect my thoughts.

ugh , i was trying to price some tickets for the jamie foxx 'blameit' tour but he doesn't have any shows in the ny/nj area. i was looking forward to that , maybe a road trip who knows.


nikki is happy ") ...maybe not all day everyday but at some point during the day I AM HAPPY which is better than what i could say in the past. ness&i been ripping & running lol keeping busy & very entertained for like the past week. i'm officially drained & i refuse to step foot outside tomorrow , cleaning & laundry all day.

still on the jobhunt ugh. but i reevaluated that idea but i'll get into that later.

lovelife...once again non-existant. it's just crazy when something you thought was going to work , doesn't. i mean like doesn't even come close. but no expectations ; no disappointments RIGHT??

iNEED to go to the beach "/

something that has been on my mind heavy..

friend (noun) a person you know well and regard with affection and trust
. . . .
friend (noun) an associate who provides cooperation or assistance

i found these in the dictionary on my phone. to me these are two totally different definitions. how many friends do you have??

i'm not tired but i'm tired of thinking so i guess i'll get some sleep...after a snack & some dr.pepper of course.

satisfy my soul.